Healing injustice
by BHP
Summary: In the hospital, Higgins told Magnum that she was leaving him to heal. But there's so much more than just the physical wounds to worry about, for all of them. Set in the 2018 reboot, this is a post-episode tag to Season 1,episode 15 – The day the past came back.


**Healing injustice  
****by BHP**

The sky outside was dark, shot through with neon skyscrapers and far distant pinpricks of starlight, barely visible in the bright fluorescent glow of hospital lights. Rick and TC were sprawled in two small, uncomfortable plastic chairs in the tiny family waiting room of the surgical floor. TC was working on his second cup of barely-drinkable coffee, while Rick was nursing a soda he'd managed to cajole the machine to dispense. It had taken multiple attempts and coins, as well as a few strategic kicks to the side of the machine to finally free the can, which had not helped Rick's temper at all.

"The nurses gone yet?" Rick kept his voice low, hoping to avoid any eavesdropping. Nurses were the worst for always seeming to know what you had planned, and finding some way to shut you down before you even got started.

"Nope. Looks like this lot are just like the ones in Germany." TC shook his head. "You'd swear they spent all day around guys like us, instead of civilians."

"You know as well as I do that we've got to get back in there." Rick started to pace again, five steps in each direction across the small space. "Or they won't like what happens next."

"You know someone just about everywhere. You don't know anyone here?" Honest curiosity filled TC's eyes.

"I may have, a few months ago." Rick actually looked away, clearly uncomfortable with where this was leading, and TC's eyes widened.

"No! It's not what you're thinking." Rick fell over the words, he was so desperate to get them out. "It's just that she's not on this floor, and she knows Noelani. Who may have pointed out, in great detail, that Thomas is a bit of a mooch on occasion."

"That's not news. So why is that a problem?"

"Claire seems to have put me in the same category. She made it very clear after the last time I tried to get my hands on supplies for the medical kit that we keep at Robin's Nest, that I should not speak to her again unless it had absolutely nothing to do with hospitals or medical supplies."

"You were trying to get supplies here?" TC laughed.

"No, actually. I wouldn't do that." Rick was offended. "I was trying to get the name of the supplier the hospital uses, so that we could buy our supplies at trade rates. Given how much stuff we tend to go through."

"So?"

"And, she took it the wrong way. Thought that was the only reason I was interested in her." Rick sighed, shook his head. "It wasn't, but it was part of the reason. So I figured maybe I should steer clear of her for a while."

Rick flopped back down into his chair, drained the soda can, and tossed it into the trash bin. TC leaned back in his chair as well, tipped his head back and closed his eyes for a moment, trying to think of a way around Rick's dead end. A faint memory pricked, and he sat up fast enough to startle Rick.

"What's up?"

"Do you think we could talk one of the nurses into finding a bottle of antiseptic solution for us?"

"What are you think-", Rick cut himself off mid-word and started to smile. "That's brilliant. I'd actually forgotten about that."

They got to their feet and headed back to the nurses' desk.

"Excuse me, miss?" The young woman turned, pitch black hair surrounding a delicate, sweet face containing huge and startled green eyes. Rick spotted the name tag on her top. "Annie. Do you think you could do us a huge favour, please? For our friend?" He indicated Magnum's room and waited until she nodded slowly.

A few moments later, Annie was on her way to find what they needed, leaving the two men hovering outside the door to Magnum's room. Rick stepped away from the wall to check for prying eyes at either end of the corridor, then nodded to TC. TC cracked the door to the room open and stared inside. He could see that the nurse who had checked on Thomas half an hour earlier had dimmed the lights, but that did nothing to hide the fact that the man in the bed wasn't sleeping peacefully.

"He's restless, Rick. But he's not talking, yet."

"That's good, TC. Let's hope it stays that way until Annie gets back."

Rick glanced towards the nurses' station and swore quietly. Annie was back, carrying what they'd asked for, but with Magnum's doctor trailing along behind her. Annie waved for Rick to join her.

"Damn." The muttered word drew TC's attention.

"What's up?" The taller man turned around, followed Rick's gaze and sighed. "Damn."

The two men made their way to Annie and the doctor. The doctor looked to be a fair bit older than both of them, and under any other circumstances, Rick would have been pleased to meet him. He looked like the stereotype of the friendly grandfather every child wanted to have. But that image went out the window the moment he opened his mouth.

"I'm Doctor Milford. Annie tells me you want a bottle of antiseptic liquid for your friend." He raised an eyebrow and Rick and TC nodded. "Well, I will have you know that we took care of all his injuries. I don't appreciate you interfering in his medical care. And I will not have my patient disturbed in any way."

"Doc," TC aimed for polite and deferential, "we're not trying to overstep here. But could you just come with me for a second and look at something?"

"It's about Thomas – Magnum. Your patient." Rick added on, quietly.

Something about the tone must have caught Milford's attention, because he simply nodded for them to lead the way. TC opened the door to Magnum's room enough to let the three of them slip in. Milford took in the restless sleep with one glance and some of the rigidity eased from his stance.

"This is not what I like to see. He needs proper sleep to heal."  
"We know that, Doc." TC was hard to ignore when truly sincere. "That's why we asked Annie for the antiseptic."

"I think he needs a little more than that, TC." Rick met TC's eyes and answered his question with a nod.

"Okay. Here's how it is, Doc. We were all in the service, and we spent some time as POWs. Our friend here had it particularly bad, and he tends to … relive … certain things when he's not well."

The doctor was now paying strict attention, and Rick hoped that TC was getting through to him.

"The smell of the antiseptic helps to make him aware of where he is now, so …" TC trailed off, and Milford nodded.

"Smell is one of the strongest senses for associations and memories. So you're saying that this smell may be enough to make him realise where he is, and sleep better?"

"That's it in a nutshell." Rick chimed in, keeping his voice quiet so as not to disturb Magnum. "The other thing that always works is making sure that he's not alone."

Milford started to shake his head.

"Hear me out, please." Rick nodded towards the bed, where Thomas was starting to move erratically, grasping at empty air with his right hand. TC immediately went to the bedside and laid a gentle hand on Magnum's right arm. He leaned over and murmured something into Magnum's ear. The movements slowed, then stopped.

Rick turned back to the doctor, and continued.

"We just want to be allowed to stay in the room, so that we can head off any more incidents like that one."

"And you can guarantee that the two of you can ensure my patient's wellbeing?"

"No." Rick reluctantly told the truth. "We can't guarantee anything, but we can say that the chances are much better with us here."

Milford stepped past Rick and picked up Magnum's chart. He skimmed down the entries, then made a notation on the bottom of page and signed his name next to it.

"I don't want to sedate him if I can help it." Milford looked up and met Rick's concern head-on. "I realise that you've probably only told me the bare bones of what's really going on here, but let me just say that I have treated other combat veterans. This is not the strangest request I've ever heard, although it's possibly one of the most sincere."

Rick and TC shared a glance before looking back to Doctor Milford, who smiled gently and finished talking.

"I've added a note to his chart that you may both be in the room at all times. Just don't get in the way, or stop any of the nurses from doing what they need to, for your friend."

"We won't. And thank you." Rick followed the doctor back to the door, and waited until the man had headed down the corridor. Then he turned to Annie and took the bottle from her with a smile. "Thanks very much."

Back in the room, he cracked open the lid of the bottle and got a whiff of the contents. He wrinkled his nose.

"That'll do the job."

He offered the bottle to TC, and the other man reached across the bed to take it. He pulled the same face as Rick had, but placed it on the table next to the bed. The smell soon filled the room, and Magnum calmed as it grew stronger.

TC waited a moment for Rick to get closer to the bed, then whispered that he was going to find some chairs. A few minutes later, he was back, carrying two of the chairs from the waiting room. He placed them quietly one each side of the bed, and settled into his as Rick took his place on the other.

"Standard two-hour watches?" TC's quiet question pulled Rick's attention away from watching Thomas breathe. He glanced across the bed to see the understanding in TC's eyes. "You go first." TC checked his watch, and added "Wake me at midnight."

"Done." Rick nodded and watched as TC settled himself into a comfortable sleeping position, bolt upright on the hard chair, and dozed off almost instantly. He turned his gaze back to the bed, and watched Thomas breathe, soothing himself with the steady, quiet sound. It had been really hard to stay positive since Thomas went missing. He knew everyone expected him to be the person who refused to see the downside of anything, but it was a hard-won skill. And one that Thomas seemed determined to test on a regular basis. What else were friends for?

Rick reached out and laid his hand gently on Thomas's hand, avoiding the pulse-ox monitor clipped to his finger, and watched his friend sleep. It had been a close thing today, and he realised that he hadn't put the debacle with Hannah as far in the past as he'd hoped. He could still feel the rage circling, looking for an opportunity to erupt, just like one of the volcanos on the island. If only he could be sure that Hannah was directly in the firing line, he wouldn't bother to leash his anger. But with her on the run, he'd have to wait. He could be patient. Good snipers always were. And he never missed a target.

"I've got your back, Tommy." The whisper slipped out, but neither Thomas nor TC moved. "Always, brother."

* * *

Juliet Higgins was paying more attention to the road to Robin's Nest than was strictly necessary. But it took her mind off other things. Things like – everything she'd learned about Magnum today, things she intended to learn about Hannah in the very near future, but mostly, she was trying not to think about how Magnum had looked in that hospital bed.

She had no doubt that he would recover, as the hospital and its staff were the best on the island. And she had a feeling that Magnum himself was simply too stubborn to allow any other outcome. But that didn't change the fact that seeing him there was somehow wrong. He was always so energetic, so vocal, and so damned annoying, that it was simply incomprehensible that he should be subdued. Or restricted in any way.

She sighed deeply, and tightened her grip on the steering wheel. She was running on fumes after a night of looking for Magnum after he was kidnapped, and a day of being threatened, shot at, and facing the possible loss of a friend. And wouldn't Magnum be simply unbearably smug to realise that he'd been upgraded to the status of friend in her life?

"You don't sound happy, Juliet."

Kumu's quiet voice filled the car, and Juliet glanced sideways to see the older woman watching her carefully.

"I'm not unhappy." As she said it, Juliet knew that Kumu would pick up on her tone. "Sorry. I know that sounded sharp. That was not my intention."

"Oh, I know that." Kumu sounded completely at ease. "I know you're worried about Magnum. You care way more than you let on. I'm not blind."

"Yes, well."

Higgins let that last idea lie. There was no way she was examining that statement in any detail. Now, or ever. She went back to Kumu's original statement.

"I'm not really worried. He's in good hands there. And he's going to be fine."

"But something is still bothering you." Kumu smiled then, her face lighting up in a way that told Juliet that this woman had been stunning in her youth, and could still be a heartbreaker today.

"I remember, not so long ago, that you made me an offer, Juliet. That I could talk to you if I needed to, tell you what I was feeling about everything that happened that day when we were held hostage at the house." Kumu's voice was quiet, contemplative.

"That day doesn't really bother me. But today, today was different." Kumu's sigh echoed Juliet's from moments earlier.

"You know, they all joke around so much – Magnum, Rick, TC. They always seem so carefree, so happy with how everything is. But to learn that all of this is there, in the background. It makes me wonder about how much they hide, the strength it takes to seem so – fine – all the time." Kumu aimed a pointed look at Juliet then, aware that the younger woman was watching her out the corner of her eye.

"And I wonder, too, how much of that is true for you as well. So, I just want to say that I'm always willing to listen, if you want to talk."

Juliet considered that carefully for a moment. There were so many things in her life that she had wanted to discuss over the years. But it was difficult to find someone you could trust, and in her previous line of work, with the requisite security clearance. But this was different. There was nothing classified about what had happened today, and even if there were, Kumu had lived it all with her. Clearance was a moot point. And she had told Kumu that she wanted to try being more open. Perhaps this was an ideal opportunity to practice that openness.

"It's just …" Higgins started, then found herself lost for words. This was why she'd never opened up before. However did you find the words to make things clear? She took a breath and started again, suddenly glad that she was doing this in the car, without having to look Kumu in the eye in daylight. The dimness somehow made it all a bit easier.

"It's the injustice of it all, I think, that really … irks … me."

"Irks?" Kumu sounded faintly amused at the word choice.

"Yes, indeed." Higgins smiled, humour in her voice. "I'm British, the word comes with the accent."

"I just wonder how much any one person can be expected to cope with." Higgins rolled her eyes at herself and carried on. The wind blew into the Ferrari and whipped her hair into her face and she shook her head slightly to clear her vision.

Kumu said nothing, waiting patiently for Juliet to get her thoughts in order.

"At least, with Richard, I knew that he loved me. That he saw me clearly and took me as I am. Lack of tact not withstanding. He wasn't a traitor, and he certainly didn't try to kill me."

"A good man." Kumu agreed.

"Funny, that's just how I described him to Magnum." Juliet laughed quietly.

"And it's Magnum who worries me now." Juliet let the concern bleed into her voice, her words. "He's a good man, you know. In spite of everything."

"Everything?" Kumu let the question hang in the air.

"I don't know how much you know about Magnum, his background."

"Probably more than you think." Kumu murmured. "He can be very talkative."

That Higgins could believe. Even though the man hardly ever said anything worth hearing.

"Maybe this is more than you know, but I trust you to keep it to yourself. He lost his father when he was very young. Then he's betrayed by the woman he loves, and spends eighteen months as a POW. Lord only knows what kind of hell that was. All the records are classified, even medical ones. He lost his mother during that same time, makes a new life here in Hawaii and then loses one of his closest friends. And now his ex-girlfriend shows up and shoots him. What must that be like? Can we even imagine what he's going through?"

"He's a strong man, Juliet. He'll be okay."

"Will he, Kumu? Can we even expect him to be?" Higgins slapped a hand on the steering wheel to emphasise her point. "I have my issues with my past. But I'm not dealing with anything like this. I'm fairly sure that if I were, I'd be a blithering idiot by now."

Kumu snorted elegantly.

"I don't think so. You're much tougher than that."

"Thank you, I think." Juliet shook her head.

Silence filled the space between them for a few moments. Then Juliet spoke again.

"I actually told him that psychologists retire on patients like him. And can you imagine what he said to me?"

"From your tone, not what you were expecting, I guess."

"He told me that all he needs is a beer and a paddle on the ocean. Can you believe the insufferable man?"

"Maybe he's right."

"You agree with him." Stunned disbelief filled Juliet's voice.

"I don't disagree with him." Kumu laughed. "I don't disagree with you, either. All I'm saying is that, if he thinks that will work, then maybe it will. For him."

After a moment, Juliet laughed. It was the first true moment of amusement in more than twenty-four hours, and it relaxed a tension she hadn't even realised was knotting her up inside. Maybe having someone to talk to about things in her life wasn't such a bad idea.

* * *

Sunlight spilled through the hospital windows, warming his skin and lightening his spirits. Magnum took a deep breath, and realised that all he could smell was antiseptic. That wasn't great, for all that it implied about the night before. He didn't really want to wake up, or open his eyes to see what sort of damage he'd done this time. But ignoring reality wasn't going to make it disappear. He turned his head fully into the sunlight and cracked his eyes open.

The first thing he could see was Rick. Sleeping upright in one of those dreadful hospital chairs, hair a mess and shirt all creased. No visible signs of damage. Always good. Although he did look exhausted. Magnum was sorry for that. He hated being the cause of trouble for his friends.

He rolled his head to the other side, and met TC's gaze.

"Hey, TC."

"Hey there. How you doing?" TC kept his question whisper-soft, eager to let Rick sleep on.

"Okay. Sore." Thomas admitted, then smiled. "Better than Germany, though."

"Not much comparison, is it?" TC was wry.

"True."

"I should hope not." Rick chipped in, tone bright.

"Sorry I woke you." Magnum sighed.

"No apologising, okay? It's not you to blame, it's these chairs." Rick grimaced and stretched. "No-one could sleep in these."

The three of them shared a knowing look and laughed.

Magnum bit his lip, deliberately looked at the bottle on the bedside table and asked, "How much damage did I do?"

"None." Rick's answer was immediate.

"Honest." TC confirmed. "We managed to get the doctor to sign off on us hanging around, and on that." He waved a hand at the bottle. "I won't say you slept like a baby, but it was an okay night."

"I swear," Magnum murmured, "sometimes, I don't think I deserve you guys."

"If you don't, who does?" Rick joked. "I wouldn't want to inflict TC on anyone else."

"Right back at you, buddy." TC grumbled, good-natured in spite of the words.

TC rose to his feet, and stretched his arms above his head, filling the room with his presence. He indicated the bottle.

"Want us to leave it open?"

"Yeah." Magnum's answer was definite. "I know you both need to leave for a while. In fact, I insist. Go home, please. I'm not going anywhere this morning."

"You're not going anywhere today at all." Rick sniped right back.

"We'll see about that." Magnum was already plotting his escape.

"Your doctor's treated veterans before." TC was amused. "I think you've met your match."

"Come on, TC." The words were almost a whine. "You know I've got to get out."

"I know." The statement was serious this time. "But your health matters more. We've got the doc on our side right now. Let's keep it that way."

"We'll stay the night again, Tommy." Rick patted his hand. "It'll be fine. You just do what you're told and heal, and maybe we can get you out tomorrow."

Magnum sighed in defeat.

"I don't want to stay."

"We know," Rick answered, "but sometimes, you just have to do what you don't want to."

Sounds were starting to filter through the closed door, and TC cracked it open to take a look. More staff were moving around, and the early morning shift change was taking place.

"Hey, Thomas, we're going to go now. Looks like the nurses are going to be around soon to poke and prod." Humour filled the comment and TC grinned at the disgusted look on Magnum's face.

Rick took that as his cue as well, and circled the bed to join TC. They left the room together, Rick glancing back to wave at Thomas.

"See you soon, bud."

As soon as they were out of earshot of the room, Rick tugged on TC's arm.

"We need to make one stop before we leave." Worry filled the words.

"What's up?"

"He's feeling a little warm to me." Rick hooked a thumb towards Magnum's room. "I just wanted to have a quick chat with Doctor Milford."

As if saying the man's name had conjured him, the doctor in question came around the corner. He laid eyes on the two men and headed straight for them.

"Good morning." He smiled, then noted their faces. "Is there something wrong?"

"Morning." Rick was concerned, but that was no reason to be rude. "We're a little worried about our friend. He seems a little warm."

"I'm aware." The doctor nodded. "I've been tracking his temperature through the night. I expected something of the sort, given the information you shared last night."

Rick and TC exchanged a glance.

"Given your shared history, I was prepared for this. I had the nurse hang new antibiotics early this morning."

Rick remembered seeing the nurse change the IV drip, but hadn't thought to read the details on the bag.

"I expect that the new drugs should knock whatever's brewing out of his system quite quickly. The temperature rise should be nothing more than a minor issue."

"Thanks for that." TC nodded.

"If you don't mind my saying so," Milford looked them both up and down, "I would suggest that you two take a break. My prescription would be a shower, food and a nap." The man smiled widely.

Rick and TC laughed.

"I assume that you will both be here tonight as well." Two heads nodded, and Milford continued. "In that case, consider yourselves banned from the premises until lunch time. We'll take good care of your friend until then."

"We know when we're beaten, Doc." TC smiled, looped an arm over Rick's shoulder and started the walk to the elevators. "But you'll call if you need us." The statement wasn't a question, and the doctor knew it. He nodded firmly, and watched the two men reluctantly leave their friend behind.

* * *

Midday was bright and sunny, with the odd cloud floating past in an achingly blue sky. Rick tilted his head back and soaked in the light, while he waited for TC to have a quick chat with Shammy. That man was a godsend, keeping an eye on everything at the business when TC was dragged into one of Magnum's cases. Or on days like today, when TC needed to be wherever Thomas was, for as long as necessary.

Moments later, a shadow blocked out the warmth on his face and he opened his eyes to see TC looming over him. The tall man surely looked better for the trip home, and Rick knew the change was just as obvious in himself. TC went round the front of the car, swung himself into the passenger seat and settled back.

"You look better." TC's perusal amused Rick.

"You're one to talk." Rick chuckled.

He drove slowly, savouring the time in the open air. They were all obsessed with being outdoors as much as possible. The psychologists in Germany had all had plenty to say about that quirk, one that they all showed, in varying degrees. But they'd all ignored the endless waffling about reasons and what the need indicated. It was perfectly clear to the four of them that they'd spent more than enough time indoors – relatively speaking – while guests of the Taliban. So wanting to be outdoors was only logical.

"I'm still worried about him." Rick broke the silence, reluctance clear.

"I know." TC agreed, "But we'll just keeping doing what we do, man. Be there. Get in his face if we have to."

"Yeah. We stuck it out before, when it was harder than this." Rick shook those memories away with the ease of long and diligent practice.

"And at least this time, we've got help. When we leave him at Robin's Nest, we can rope in Higgy as well." Rick was pleased at the thought.

"You think?" TC sounded sceptical.

"I know. She knows about our visits." Rick admitted, quietly.

"I didn't think Thomas would mention them to her."

"He didn't." Rick felt uncomfortable with the turn the conversation was taking, but what was a little embarrassment if it helped Thomas? "Turns out she takes her job very seriously."

"And that involves spying on him?" TC didn't sound impressed.

"No. It's not like that, TC. She reviews the video footage regularly, and you know Thomas made sure that every inch of the estate is covered."

"Yeah, so?"

"Well, I … I went back to Robin's Nest one night, the night Toni left. I just needed some time to get my head around everything, and I figured I'd spend some time on the beach." Rick sighed at his own stupidity. "She spotted me on the cameras, and came out to talk. She mentioned that she'd seen us there before. She'd already guessed most of it, and I really just confirmed what she'd been thinking."

TC waved that off as unimportant. It was done, so there was no changing things. And having Higgins as a backup wasn't at all a bad idea. The woman's skills could be downright terrifying.

"It's done. More important – you went back there alone. Why didn't you call me, Rick?" The hurt lingered in TC's question.

"You had that early flight the next day, remember – the elderly lovebirds, you called them. I didn't want you losing sleep over me, and maybe missing something on the flight." Rick was definite. He would not be the cause of an injury to TC.

"That's no excuse, Orville. You know better."

"Yeah, I do. But honestly, it is the truth." Rick tried to be convincing, but he knew that he couldn't fool TC. The other man knew him far too well.

He glanced across at TC and sighed.

"Don't give me that look, TC. It is the truth." Then he hedged, knowing he couldn't lie. "Well, part of it, at least."

The glare diminished not at all. Rick met TC's eyes and rolled his own.

"You should patent that look." TC remained unmoved, simply crossing his arms to emphasise his views.

"Okay, I admit that it's no excuse." Rick sighed deeply. "It's just – I didn't want to drag you down with me."

That cracked the intensity of TC's stare.

"You couldn't drag me down." He unbent enough to pat Rick's shoulder. "Look, I know you're not always as happy as you'd like us to think, but you don't ever drag anyone down. We don't expect you to be happy all the time."

Rick shook his head, wondering at how TC could go from stern to soft in a single heartbeat.

"But you are the guy who always manages to see the bright side."

"Not always, TC." The words were out before Rick thought it through. "I told you, I'm a child of divorce. It was find the bright side, or slit my wrists."

TC said nothing, and Rick slanted a sideways look at his friend. TC looked suddenly serious, before looking away at the road.

"Pull over. Right now." The urgency in TC's voice jolted Rick and he immediately scanned the road ahead for space. He pulled into the first clear spot on the shoulder that he could find. He couldn't see anything on the road to cause TC's reaction. Then TC pulled on Rick's shoulder, forcing him to look TC in the eyes. Eyes that were stunned, and a little frightened.

"Damn, brother. You actually mean that. Really?"

"Yeah." Rick sighed the word out. He'd really opened a can of worms this time.

"Never. You hear me. Never, Orville." TC's grip on his shoulder tightened to a fraction short of painful. "No matter what or when or where. You ever feel like that again, you call me. Okay?"

"It's been years, TC." Rick scrambled to reassure his friend.

"I don't care. You will call me." The order carried more weight than any he'd ever obeyed in the Marines. But he tried to explain.

"I hadn't even enlisted then. Hell, I hadn't even graduated high school." TC didn't look at all reassured. If anything, he was looking more concerned. "I never actually tried, either, TC. I've never even thought about it since then. Not even there."

The tone of the last word made it clear that Rick meant Afghanistan. If that hadn't made him crack, he couldn't think of anything else that had the power.

"You never told me; you never told any of us." TC sounded stunned and really upset by the omission.

"You never told me about art school and dance class." Rick tried to lighten the moment, but TC wasn't buying it.

"That is so not the same thing, Orville."

"I'll give you that." Rick laughed, then sobered quickly. "But honestly, TC, it just never came up, never seemed important. It's not a big deal."

The look on TC's face suggested that he was seriously considering whacking some sense into Rick's head. But he restricted himself to words.

"Look at me." He shook Rick slightly, until Rick was giving TC his full attention. "It is a big deal. A very big deal. Huge, even. To me, and it will be to Thomas, when I tell him." That Thomas would be told was inevitable. Rick shook his head despairingly.

"Come on, TC. Don't do that, man. He doesn't need anything else to shoulder right now." Playing the Thomas card was a low blow, but Rick figured if he could get TC to let the issue slide for a while, the other man might forget it altogether.

"How would you feel if you didn't know something this important about him, or me?" The gentle question went through Rick's defences like a guided missile. He couldn't fight TC when he was like this. He sighed and capitulated.

"You win, big guy. But let him get past this week first, okay?" Some time to prepare for Magnum's reaction would be useful. If TC's response was anything to go by, he was in for another tongue lashing when Thomas found out.

"I'll let him get out the hospital. That's all I can promise." TC's tone gave no leeway at all.

Rick shut his eyes and tipped his head back into the sunlight. He should really learn to curb his tongue. But underneath the mild annoyance he felt, a deeper emotion stirred. He knew that his friends cared for him, loved him, wanted the best for him. For that reason alone, he'd deal with this. Whenever TC dropped the bombshell.

"Okay, TC. You win." Rick smiled then, his normal happy attitude back in place. "Just like you knew you would."

TC just smiled and waved a hand towards the road.

"You were taking us somewhere?"

They both laughed at that, and Rick pulled back on to the road to the hospital.

* * *

Higgins closed the door to the guest house softly behind her. She had no idea why she was being so stealthy about her visit to Magnum's domain, except that it was – after all – Magnum's domain. She didn't intend to pry, and she certainly didn't want Magnum or his friends to think that she didn't respect his privacy. After the previous day's events, she could quite understand their desire to keep so many parts of their past sealed away from their present.

She moved quietly into his bedroom, keeping her eyes fixed firmly on the closet and not on the various mementos scattered around the room. She knew that everything in this room could provide the sort of insight into Magnum that spies would give their eye teeth for; but she wasn't a spy any longer, and Magnum's secrets were his own. She stepped over the shirt lying crumpled on the floor, bypassed the pair of sneakers abandoned half under the bed, and opened the closet door. She pulled out a pair of beige shorts, flip flops and a button-up shirt. She couldn't resist choosing the shirt she had given him to replace the one the lads had shredded. A T-shirt would probably be softer, but getting it on would involve more movement of his shoulder. She looked on the top shelf of the closet and grabbed a small knapsack. She dropped the clothes into it, then detoured to the bathroom for toothpaste and a toothbrush, a few other necessary items, and dropped those into the bag as well. Mission completed, she retraced her steps, and let herself out the front door.

She stood in the sunshine for a moment and took a deep breath. She'd slept last night, more than she'd expected, but she'd still been awake to watch the dawn. She'd started her day with a nice, long run on the beach with the lads, then dived straight into one of her most challenging yoga workouts. Although she felt more settled than when she and Kumu has returned to Robin's Nest the previous evening, she knew she was still a long way from balanced. And as she'd told Amanda Sako, you were no good to anyone without balance. Especially yourself.

She headed for the main house, detouring past the Ferrari to drop the bag on the passenger seat. She'd stop by the hospital later in the day and see how Magnum was getting on. She doubted very much that he'd be discharged today, but maybe she could get an estimate of a time-frame on his release. Sharing a meal with everyone involved in this … little incident … might be a good way to lift Magnum's spirits. But she needed more details before she could organise the 'welcome home' party. She was no psychologist, but no-one could be as fine as that man said he was. Even if he had tried to sell his line of baloney with that same cocky grin she'd first seen when he moved in.

The sound of a car engine stopped her progress to the main house and she backtracked to the gate. A plain black car was just pulling to a halt at the gate, and Higgins was about to demand details of the visitor when she recognised Detective Katsumoto. She keyed in the code and waited while the gate opened and he parked behind the Ferrari. The detective got out of the car and slipped his jacket on. So this was an official visit.

"Good morning, Detective."

"Higgins." Katsumoto inclined his head slightly, an old-world courtesy that Higgins found charming.

"What can I do for you, Detective?"

"I could have simply called." Katsumoto answered, "But I just …"

"Quite." Higgins nodded. "It's always better to do things in person, I agree."

She turned towards the house, sweeping an arm in gracious invitation.

"Please come inside."

Once settled in chairs in her office, Higgins took the lead again.

"What is it that you need?"

"I know there's no point in talking to Magnum yet. He's still on pain medication and nothing he said would be admissible legally. So, in the meantime, I wanted to speak to you and Kumu about getting statements on what happened yesterday."

"Certainly." Higgins nodded. She'd expected nothing less. "Would you like us to come in to HPD?"

"That would be best, I think." Katsumoto nodded, then smiled at Higgins. He was really a very attractive man, she had to admit.

"If I had to guess, with your background, I'd say you could probably write a statement better than anyone at HPD, but we do need to follow procedures."

"Yes, indeed. Procedures." Higgins emphasised the last word slightly, fully aware that procedures didn't require the detective to visit in person to request a statement.

Katsumoto shifted in his chair, and Juliet knew she'd struck a nerve. Damn Magnum for just being who he was; now he had police detectives worrying about him as well, even as he continually got in their way and raised their blood pressure. She felt obliged to let the poor detective off the hook.

"I'll be visiting Magnum this afternoon. Would you like me to pass on your request that he make a statement as soon as his doctor clears him?"

"Thank you."

"This time, I do have some idea of what to expect from his statement. Well, I think I do." Katsumoto sighed. "He's really not good at sharing information. Although he expects me to share whenever he sticks his nose into HPD business."

"Ah, yes." Higgins had to agree. "He does seem to have an over-developed sense of – responsibility, shall I say, once he gets involved in anything."

"Is that what you're calling it?" Katsumoto shook his head. "All I know is, every time I turned around on that Larry Hayes case, I was tripping over him."

Higgins couldn't stop the laugh, and waved a hand in the air to indicate the house and surroundings.

"Now, imagine living with that all the time." Katsumoto simply shook his head.

"At least, yesterday, he did keep me informed. And he asked for help."

"That is unusual, I must admit." Higgins considered that point. "Perhaps he's finally learning to accept some help occasionally."

"I get the idea that he thinks it should be the other way around." Katsumoto offered. "He thinks that he should always be the one helping someone else. He doesn't think that anyone should help him."

Juliet sat silent for a moment, somewhat floored by that insight. She thought back over the many cases that Magnum had dragged her and his friends into, and realised that Katsumoto had spotted something she'd missed in Magnum's character before now. He was always cadging favours and loans, but now that she thought about it, nothing he asked for was ever for himself. She wondered whether that was another crime to lay at Hannah's feet.

"I hadn't actually thought of that, Detective." Higgins's admission was rueful.

"It didn't just come to me, either." The man admitted. "I was watching that press conference on Larry Hayes's computer – the one at Bagram Air Force Base."

"Yes, I saw a portion of that myself.' Juliet wondered where this was heading.

"All he talked about was serving, helping other people. He didn't mention wanting anything for himself. The omission made me think." Katsumoto's laugh was self-deprecating.

"It's the detective's curse; we're always thinking about what people say and don't say, and what it actually means." He shrugged one shoulder.

"And then you add in yesterday, and it makes you re-consider everything you thought you knew."

"It does." Higgins had learned something new to add to her knowledge of Magnum. "Thank you, Detective."

"I hate to admit it," Katsumoto actually flinched at the thought, "but he is actually good at what he does."

"I know. Galling, isn't it?" Higgins shared the sentiment.

"You have no idea."

Katsumoto rose to his feet then.

"Thanks for your time. If you could just let me know when you and Kumu will be able to visit HPD, I'll make sure there's someone available to record your statements."

"Of course." Higgins walked out with the detective, and waited while he slipped his jacket off before getting into his car.

"Detective?" She waited until she had his full attention. "You're always welcome here. No need to find a reason to drop by."

She knew she'd read him correctly when he stopped himself from answering and made do with a smile and a wave as he drove away.

One more thing to add to her list of oddities about Magnum. The man seemed to be able to draw anyone into his circle of friends, even when everything about the situation told them that they'd be better off running in the opposite direction. At speed. Quite a talent the man had.

* * *

Afternoon visiting hours had barely begun when Higgins made her way to the surgical floor of the hospital. She needed to make a few stops on her way home, so she planned to stay for a short while and leave Magnum in the company of his friends for the rest of the afternoon. She didn't even stop to think why she was so sure that they would be there, she just accepted the fact in the same way that one accepted that the sky was blue. And as expected, there Rick and TC were, ensconced in two uncomfortable plastic chairs.

As she set foot in Magnum's room, the smell hit her like a wet blanket to the face. She couldn't help the hitch in her breath.

"What is that vile smell?"

Magnum laughed at the look on her face and waved her into the room. He pointed at the bottle of antiseptic on the table and Higgins nodded. She looked him over and thought that he looked tired. It crossed her mind that he most likely hadn't slept well, and probably wouldn't for a while to come.

"Would you like me to close that bottle for you?"  
"No." The answer was immediate, the tone hard and sharp, quite unlike his usual laid-back one.

"Okay, then." Moving on, Juliet, she told herself.

"How are you doing? Any indication of how long they plan to keep you?"

"Missing me already, Higgins?"

"Not at all. But the lads are missing their prey."

That raised snorts of laughter from around the room.

Higgins offered the knapsack she carried to Rick, who looked inside and nodded.

"Thanks, Higgy."

Magnum raised an eyebrow and Rick answered.  
"Clothes, stuff for when you get out of here."

"Tomorrow, right?" Magnum's question had the tone of a much-repeated comment.

"Hopefully." TC nodded.

"Good to know." Juliet commented.

"I promised Detective Katsumoto that you would get in touch with him about making your statement, as soon as you're cleared by your doctor."  
"I could have given it to him here." Magnum sounded genuinely sincere.

"Yes, no doubt." Higgins came closer to the bed, nodding her thanks to Rick, who offered her his chair. She looked at the IV as she sat down, then smiled at Magnum. "But he was quite clear on the fact that anything you told him while on medication would be inadmissible."

"Really? After everything that happened, that's his biggest concern?" Disbelief coloured the questions.

"Well, he does seem to be a bit of a stickler for doing things by the book. You know, procedures and all those things that you so blithely disregard."

TC and Rick both tried to stifle their laughter, but the disgusted look on Magnum's face made it a losing battle.

A pleasant half hour passed quickly, before Higgins excused herself. Rick waved to her as she left the room, while TC insisted on walking with her all the way to the car. Once in the elevator, Higgins pinned TC with a glare.

"You're well aware that I don't actually need a chaperone to walk me to my car? So you must have some other reason for accompanying me."

The big man just smiled at her.

"My mother raised me to escort a lady to her car." Then he shrugged. "But she never said I couldn't kill two birds with one stone, either."

"So fire away, TC."

"Thomas wasn't being difficult about the bottle."

Higgins thought of the flash of something she'd seen in Magnum's eyes at that moment – panic, fear? – and waited for TC to speak.

"He's not really happy being here. Being here means something went wrong, and things that go wrong tend to make him edgy."

"Edgy? Like the nights you visit him? That kind of edgy?"

"Yeah, like that."

"So how does that truly vile smell help?"

"Bad guys never put you in a hospital. Only your own guys – the good guys – put you in hospitals that smell like that. So …" TC let Higgins draw her own conclusions.

"He can smell it even when he's asleep?" TC nodded in answer to her question.

"Noted." Higgins filed the fact way in case she ever needed it in future.

They left the elevator and headed towards the car. Higgins considered glossing over the issue, but if it could affect Magnum's return to the house, she wanted to be up-to-speed.

"May I ask one more question?"

"Sure. I'll probably answer." TC grinned.

"I saw the label on the IV. That's rather an aggressive antibiotic, isn't it?" As far as she knew, it was one of the strongest on the market, and it seemed a little extreme for the level of injuries Magnum was nursing.

"Yeah, it is." TC opened the car door for her. She turned to face him.

"Is there something I should be aware of?"

"Nothing serious. Not today." TC hitched one shoulder, then turned to face her properly. "The Korengal wasn't exactly good for our health. Any of us. Our immune systems aren't the best they've ever been. Won't ever be, either. The doc thought it best not to take any chances."

"Sensible. A man after my own heart." Higgins realised that she was actually relieved that someone other than Magnum had control over his health.

"I will leave you to your vigil, TC." Higgins knew now that the two men would be here through the night, and not just to provide Magnum with company. "I can expect you all at Robin's Nest by midday tomorrow, I assume?"

"Unless the doc changes his mind." TC's tone made it clear just what Magnum would think of that turn of events.

Juliet slid into the car and watched TC head back into the building. She wondered if the three men realised just how special their friendship was, that none of them thought anything of re-arranging their lives for each other at a moment's notice. She'd never really had that type of relationship with anyone outside her family. For a moment, that thought saddened her. And then she thought of how those men had done the same thing for her. Just as she had done to help Magnum when Hannah returned. She tilted her head to the side and considered the implications. Family. The word brought with it warmth and happiness, and those feelings carried her through the rest of the day.

* * *

The sun had barely made it over the horizon the next morning, before Rick and TC headed home from the hospital. The doctor had agreed to release Magnum mid-morning, provided he took the prescribed medication and followed instructions. Magnum had been willing to promise anything to secure his release, but the doctor had made sure to get matching promises from Rick and TC before agreeing to sign the paperwork.

Rick had dropped TC back at his place, and carried on to his own home. One shower and breakfast later, he'd packed a bag with enough clothes for a day or two and was waiting for TC to swing by and pick him up. They'd talked it over the night before, the three of them, and decided that TC's van was the easiest option for getting Thomas home in comfort.

He didn't know quite how they were going to hide the facts from Higgins. That woman was too damn smart, and she'd surely pick up on the fact that they were on the estate at all hours of the night. Then again, she did know that they hung out more when Thomas needed them, so maybe she'd let it slide.

Now, only a few hours since stepping through his own front door, Rick was outside again. TC's van came around the corner, and Rick strolled over to the sidewalk. He dropped his bag in the back, noting that TC also had a bag packed, before settling himself in the passenger seat.

Less than an hour later, they were back on the road, with the hospital shrinking in the rear-view mirror. Thomas was settled in the back of the van, muttering darkly about slings, and injunctions not to strain his arm and side.

"I know my body. I know what it can handle."

"Course you do." Rick nodded right along with him. "But not listening to the doctor, and not doing exactly what he said, will get you a one-way trip back to that nice hospital bed you just got away from. So what are you going to do?"

"What he said." Magnum ground the agreement out with a bad grace.

"And that includes taking the meds." TC added his voice.

"If I have to." Fractious toddlers had nothing on Thomas in this state of mind.

"You do." Two voices confirmed the order, and Magnum finally gave in and laughed.

"Okay, I give in. I'll do what he said."

Instead of heading straight out to Robin's Nest, TC decided to take the scenic route. A few minutes later, he pulled into a tiny parking lot with a wide-open view of the ocean and a slice of golden sand. Parking the van, he killed the ignition and got out, waving the others to follow him to a bench on edge of the beach. Rick shrugged in answer to Magnum's querying head tilt, and they simply followed TC.

Rick sprawled across the bench, arms stretched out along the back. TC let Magnum stand on the warm sand for a while before indicating the bench with a wave. Magnum settled carefully on the seat, tension easing out of him as the warmth and freedom became more tangible. He let his eyes fall shut and sighed happily.

"We need to talk." TC's announcement made Magnum's eyes pop open. "Just the three of us."

"TC, what's wrong?" Injuries immediately forgotten, Magnum looked as if he was ready to leap up and take on the world, if needed.

"You know how Rick here is always looking for the bright side of everything?" TC asked.

"Yeah." Thomas nodded. "Like telling us all that the Taliban were doing us a favour by keeping us in the dark – they were lowering our lifetime risk of skin cancer."

TC snickered at the memory.

"I've always wondered how you manage to do that, always find something good." Magnum eyed Rick carefully.

"It's a choice, that's all. One I made a long time ago." Rick's answer was quiet.

"Now Rick and I disagree on the timing of this." TC saw Rick shake his head frantically, and went on regardless. "But we don't disagree that you have a right to know. I found out yesterday that our friend here once considered killing himself."

"Geez, TC, you make it sound so bad." Rick muttered.

"And it's not?" Magnum jerked upright. "Why the hell, Rick?"

"Look, it was long before I met you guys, back when the parents were getting divorced. Nothing I did was ever right, nothing ever seemed to get any better." Rick wasn't looking at them any more, seeing instead whatever had driven him in the past. "And one day, it just seemed like it might be a simple solution. The easiest choice. But …"

"You call." Thomas's voice was shot through with horror. "I don't care what time, where I am, what else might be going on, nothing, okay? Nothing is more important. You call. Hear me?"

Rick sighed heavily.

"Man, you guys just don't listen. I told you, just now, I made a different choice. Okay?" He looked at them both, as serious as they had ever seen him. But their expressions didn't change at all.

"It was one time, okay? And I didn't even try! I was just a dumb kid, who didn't know that he had other options."

"Well, you do have other options." TC's tone brooked no arguments. It matched perfectly with the solid wall of his presence, arms crossed firmly across his chest.

"Two of them." Magnum laid his good hand on Rick's shoulder and squeezed gently.

"And you will call them. Promise me. Promise us." He tightened his grip on Rick's shoulder.

Rick realised then just how badly his single comment had scared his friends. More, perhaps, than he'd thought possible, given everything they'd survived together. It wasn't that hard to give them what they wanted. Not when it was truly what he wanted too.

"Okay, okay. I promise."

The way the tension immediately drained out of TC said more than words ever could. Magnum's grip on his shoulder eased to nothing more than a gentle pressure. The weight was comforting, familiar, grounding.

"I have to say – if I didn't already know how much you both care, this would prove it." A cheeky smile accompanied the words, drawing matching smiles from the other two men. But the words, in a seamless two-voice harmony, were far more serious.

"Always, brother."

* * *

The lawns leading down to the tidal pool welcomed the three men to the estate. TC whistled quietly as he parked the Island Hoppers van.

"Check that out." He murmured to Rick.

"Looks like Higgy was even more worried that she let on." Rick's comment was equally quiet.

"Worried about what?" The question from behind them had both men rolling their eyes. TC tipped his head to Rick, leaving him to answer the question.

"You, you knucklehead." Fond amusement filled Rick's answer.

"I'm fine." That phrase was starting to wear very thin, but Rick knew to let it slide. Thomas needed to say it, so he would let him say it as often as his friend felt he had to.

"You're not." TC was blunt. "But you will be."

"And Higgins was really worried about you." Rick was serious now. "You didn't see her after you passed out on the highway."

That fact seemed to distract Thomas, and Rick took the opportunity to get out of the van and grab Magnum's knapsack.

Magnum eased himself slowly out of the van. He was still way more tired than he wanted to admit, and every muscle ached just enough to make him wish he was back on hospital-grade painkillers. TC closed the door behind him and matched his slow steps.

"I hate this." Magnum sighed the words out.

TC raised an eyebrow.

"Healing." Thomas clarified. "It's always so slow. So restrictive."

"Yeah, I know." TC had his own first-hand experience with healing, and could only agree.

"Too much time to think." Rick chimed in.

"That too." Magnum shook his head. "I just feel like everything's … off-balance."

Rick laid his arm across Magnum's shoulders, careful to avoid the bandages and sling.

"We've been here before, Tommy." The spectre of Germany and the hospital there lingered. "But you know how this story ends."

"You'll be good as new in a week or two." TC confirmed with a smile.

"I know." Thomas nodded. "But the journey's slow and annoying. So sue me if I wish we were at the end already."

That raised a genuine laugh from all of them.

They got their first real look at the gathering on the lawn when their little group moved around the front of TC's van. Kumu was presiding over a table that seemed to be laid out with enough food to feed a small army. As they watched, Higgins and Katsumoto – of all people – appeared from the direction of the main house, each carrying a cooler box. Higgins settled her box in the shade of the table, and was turning to head back to the house when she spotted them. She immediately waved, before saying something to Katsumoto. He nodded and headed back to the house, while Higgins headed in their direction, floral wraparound skirt flapping gently in the slight breeze.

Moments later, she stopped in front of them and gave Magnum a thorough visual once-over. A single nod offered her opinion.

"What is all this?" Magnum shook his head in bewilderment.

"And here I thought that food would be self-explanatory." Higgins sighed in mock despair, and brushed a strand of hair behind her ear.

"It is, I think." Magnum grinned, then shook his head. "But why?"

"Because we thought you might appreciate something other than hospital food. But if that's not the case, I'm sure I can arrange for something suitably bland and unappetising to be delivered."

Juliet's sarcasm simply rolled off Magnum, and a surprised and delighted smile lit up his face. As she spotted the smile, Higgins realised that he truly hadn't expected any fuss, and chalked up another issue to add to her list of things to lay at Hannah's door. The list had already grown to an impressive length, and Juliet was looking forward to the day she could have a little heart-to-heart chat with the woman. Her mother had always said that she was good at nursing a grudge, especially in support of a worthy cause.

"So, rather than stand around here, perhaps you could head that way?" Higgins waved a hand towards the lawn.

Kumu was already well on the way to meet them, the bright pink flower in her hair matched to the pale pink flower pattern on her dress. Moments later, the older woman laid a gentle hand on Magnum's arm and smiled at him.

"Escort me?" She indicated the table with one hand.

"My pleasure, Kumu." Magnum's smile was genuine, and the two of them set off at a slow pace towards the table.

"Hey, Thomas." Rick called after them. "We'll just drop your stuff in the guest house for you. Check the food situation, the usual, okay?"

"Thanks, guys."

Higgins fell into step beside Rick and TC as they headed into the guest house. Rick headed into the bedroom to drop off the knapsack, before coming back out to the living area. Higgins waited while the two men opened the refrigerator, and the grocery cupboard, and bit back a smile at their reactions.

The shelves of the refrigerator were well stocked with simple, healthy food, all of it things that could be easily managed with one hand. The cupboard contained a wide-range of Thomas's favourite snacks, along with a selection of those that TC and Rick each favoured as well.

Rick reached into the refrigerator and pulled out a bottle of beer, checked the label and grinned.

"Non-alcoholic. Nice."

"I assumed that he wouldn't be permitted any alcohol with the medication." Higgins was sure there would be medication. Given how careful the doctor at the hospital had been so far, there was no way he'd have discharged Magnum without follow-up prescriptions.

"You've really been busy, Higgins." TC was impressed.

"But that's a lot of food for one guy." Rick sounded confused.

"Well, that would be because I was catering for three." Higgins stared them both down, daring them to say anything.

"I presume that you will both be staying over for a few nights, perhaps longer. In which case, you may as well be as comfortable as circumstances permit. Not so?"

The two men exchanged glances, a silent conversation taking place. Then both men smiled at her, and Rick answered for them both.

"Since you put it that way. Thank you."

"You're welcome."

Before either man could move, Higgins spoke again. But now her tone was all business.

"I think you should both know that I have set up my own automatic searches and alerts for Hannah. I am aware that Detective Katsumoto has done the same from his side, but at the risk of insulting the HPD, I have access to networks that they could only wish for."

"We figured as much. Thomas says you're very good at what you do." Rick answered for both men. TC simply folded his arms and waited for Juliet to finish.

"I also think you should know that –" Juliet stalled for a moment, trying to find the right words.

"I will run anything I may find past the two of you first, before I inform Magnum."

TC just smiled, hugely amused, while Rick snorted a laugh.

"He won't be happy about that when he finds out."  
"Then he'll just have to be unhappy." Higgins statement made it clear just how little that possibility worried her.

"He's lost too much already to that woman. His freedom, your freedom, time with his mother before she passed, his self-worth and good opinion of himself. She does not get to take anything more from him – not if I have any say in it."

"Careful, Higgins. You're starting to sound like you really care." TC's smile had broadened into genuine amusement, further fuelled by the faint flush that rose on Juliet's cheeks.

"Well, I … he …" She stumbled over the words and Rick came to her rescue.

"It's okay, Higgy, we won't tell." Rick shook his head. "We get it. Honestly."

He ticked points off on his fingers.

"You meet Thomas. He irritates you. Really irritates you. And then, suddenly, he's a friend."

"Go figure." TC grinned at her.

"Quite." Higgins recovered her equilibrium with a matching grin and indicated the front door. "Perhaps we should join the others now?"

* * *

By mid-afternoon, just the four of them remained outdoors. Katsumoto had headed back to his overloaded desk at HPD, with a firm appointment set for the following day for Higgins and Kumu to get their official statements on record. After helping with the general clean-up, Kumu had headed to the cultural centre to finish up preparations for another group of school children to visit the estate.

Rick and TC had finally taken Thomas at his word that it wouldn't bother him to see them out on the water, while he was effectively beached until his stitches were removed. The two were now floating out beyond the breakers on their surfboards. Thomas had slowly made his way down to the beach next to the tidal pool and had settled himself on the sand, right arm slung around a pulled-up knee to keep his balance. Higgins was perched next to him, looking for all the world like the personification of the phrase 'on tenterhooks'.

"Relax, Higgins." Magnum glanced her way. "I'm fine. I'm not going anywhere."  
"I suppose not." She didn't really sound sure of the fact, but slowly unwound her tense posture into something calmer, less highly-strung.

"I'm glad they're out there together." Magnum tipped his head towards his friends. "They need it. The last couple of days have been really rough on them."

"And not on you?" Higgins had to ask, but wasn't at all surprised that Magnum pretended not to hear her.

She'd decided to let the whole issue slide when he finally spoke again.

"I hate not being able to get out there with them." Magnum sighed gently. "Too much time alone in my head."

"I can understand that." And she did. Anyone in her line of work, or his for that matter, would know how too much time to think could lead to dark places.

"Sometimes, I wonder." The words were quiet, barely loud enough to be clear.

"About?"

"What I did, or what I am, that's so wrong – so damaged – that I attracted someone like Hannah." He honestly sounded curious and so damned sincere that Higgins was hard put not to raise her voice.

"It's not you. Whatever's wrong, or as you so charmingly put it – damaged – isn't in you." She waited until he looked at her before she went on. "Whatever it is, it's in her. The decisions were always hers."

"That's not much comfort, Higgy." He sounded scathing of himself now. "How did I miss it?"

"Because you have a tendency to trust people. To believe the best of them, until you have a reason not to." Higgins was sure of this, even if Magnum doubted it.

"That almost sounds like a compliment."

"It was. Just this once." Higgins laughed.

"I do have some idea of what you're feeling." Talking to Kumu on the way back from the hospital had actually helped her. Although she preferred to keep things to herself, she knew that anything she told Magnum would stay with him. In spite of his sometimes endless chatter, the important things stayed well hidden.

"After Ian came here, I spent a lot of time wondering what I missed. What had I failed to see? How complicit was I in Richard's death?"

"Hey, now. That's not on you." Magnum chipped in, concern clear in his words.

"I never questioned him. I followed his lead. Did I somehow make what he was doing easier, by not digging deeper?" Higgins mused thoughtfully, ignoring his comment.

"And then I thought about what you said to me, when I wanted to shoot him. You never questioned that I was a good person, that I wouldn't shoot him. That I would do what was right."

"And I was right." Magnum nodded.

"Yes. You helped me to see something that night. That Ian and I are fundamentally different. Down inside, where it really matters. He made choices I could never have made. Did things I would never have been able to do."

"Very different." Magnum shifted slightly to rest his hand on her shoulder for a moment.

"And that same thinking applies here. Our situations have that in common." Higgins turned her head to meet Magnum's eyes. "Somewhere deep inside, Hannah was hiding her true nature from you. Whether that was always the case, or whether she made that decision long after she met you, you may never know. But the fact is that nothing you said or did could have changed her decisions and actions."

She turned back to the sea and watched Rick and TC splashing water at each other like children.

"To use your words, that's not on you."

Magnum stared at her for a moment, thinking over everything she'd said. Many of the psychologists that had shuttled through the hospital in Germany had said much the same things that Higgins had just laid out for him. But none of them had ever managed to make things quite this simple. Higgins was unique. That thought bled into a slow smile.

"Why that smile?" Higgins appraised him with a glance.

"Just thinking."

"So you do know how. Alert the press." The snide comment shot out before she could curb it, but Magnum only grinned.

"Like I said before – you're all heart, aren't you?" Amusement filled his eyes.

"Care to share?"

"I think … that I'm lucky to have met Hannah."

"Oh, now you've lost me. Are you sure you didn't pick up a head injury as well?" Higgins looked him up and down, as though hunting for previously-invisible injuries.

"I told you, I'm fine. No head injury." The smile lingered on his face and in his voice.

"Thomas, she betrayed you. Stole from you – your freedom, a year and a half of your life, your peace of mind …" Juliet knew she'd slipped up by using his name, let on how much she worried about him. But he let it slide, and simply nodded.

"Okay, I admit, if I'd never met her, there'd have been less bad stuff." Magnum's gaze went back to his friends, sadness showing for a moment.

"Bit of an understatement, that." The comment was dry. Magnum glanced her way and shrugged.

"But I wouldn't have what I have now, either." He took a deep breath and carried on.

"You can keep listing all the bad stuff, but right now, I'm going to try to take a page out of Rick's book." He smiled then, looking at his friend, who just been up-ended off his board by TC in retaliation for swamping the bigger man.

"When everything sucks, sometimes you have to choose to see the good stuff instead of the bad. I have good stuff. A home, a job I'm good at, the chance to help people."

"Points in your favour, I must admit." Higgins agreed, "Far more introspective than I would have expected from you."

"I'm not just a pretty face."

"And there's the inflated ego." She just couldn't help herself, even though she was pretty sure he was baiting her on purpose.

"And there's one more thing, the most important thing of all. Without her, without what she did, my friends might never have become my family. Rick and TC. Nuzo. Old friends, ones I can trust to be exactly who I think they are." Magnum sounded faintly stunned at the thought of the riches in his life.

"And there's some new friends, too. Kumu, Katsumoto even."

"I'm not sure he'd agree with you on that." Higgins couldn't help but laugh.

"I'm winning him over."

"If that includes him threatening to arrest you, then by all means, believe that you're winning him over."

"You'd like to see him do that, wouldn't you?"

"I wouldn't say like, per se, but …" Higgins glanced at Magnum, "you probably are going to do something, at some point, that lands you in jail."

Magnum shared the joke, but she could see something else was still preying on his mind. She let her mind wander, thinking over everything she knew about him, everything she'd learned in the last week. The strength he must have to be sitting on the beach, reasonably healthy and mostly well-adjusted. After everything he'd survived, that was an accomplishment on its own. If she had to be honest, with herself at least, even if with no-one else, she knew he was good friend. Perhaps one of the best she'd ever had.

"So." He dragged the word out. "Like I was saying, not everything is bad. What happened with Hannah led to some good things too."

He shifted, seemingly uncomfortable about whatever he wanted to say next. The he flapped his hand at the space between them.

"Like this."

She cocked her head, puzzlement on her face.

"I would like to be able to add one more new friend. I hope." The last two words slipped out very quietly, almost drowned out by the gentle waves on the shoreline.

"You, Juliet. Just as you are."

The words were an offer. One that she could see had been hard for him to articulate. He wasn't the sort of man who felt the need to say things out loud. He would rather show people what he meant, what he felt, with his actions. By being there when he was needed, and doing whatever he had to, in order to keep a promise.

But this offer made one thing very clear. He trusted her. After the damage that Hannah had done to him, that was something huge. That thought crystallised something for her too. After everything that had happened since she met him, she realised that when it came to the truly important things in her life, she trusted him too.

Which left only one possible reply to his quiet request.

"I would be honoured, Thomas."


End file.
